Today marks the start of December, and that means one thing: Christmas is on the way. This is a time of year which brings joy and happiness to lots of people. Sadly, it also has a negative effect on the mental health of many sufferers of depression, anxiety, and other psychological conditions.
Christmas is a time of mixed (and many) emotions for me. As it approaches, I find myself tending to ‘withdraw’ from life, staying at home instead of celebrating with friends. My mood drops, and I often find myself experiencing more fatigue and thus sleeping more. I really, really want to love Christmas, to be full of festive cheer. There have been years when I have genuinely looked forward to, and enjoyed, Christmas. But equally, even just the mention of the c-word can scattergun my emotional wellbeing.
If television and radio adverts and social media are to be believed, the way to 'do Christmas properly' is to enjoy a big dinner with the whole family, before playing Nintendo with granddad and stepping outside into a snow-filled winter wonderland. Everyone is meant to be happy and sociable and if you aren’t, well, you're not ‘doing Christmas properly’.
This, of course, is utter codswallop, but it undeniably piles on the pressure to enjoy the festive season to the fullest. And if you are struggling with your mental health, chances are you will be feeling pretty overwhelmed and under pressure anyway…
For the past couple of years, we have done without Christmas decorations in our house, due to their triggering effect on me. My mum, with whom I live, isn’t really big on Christmas anyway, so she doesn’t seem to mind at all. I think she probably feels the same as me.
Bereavement and a sense of loss are often said to be the root cause of negative attitudes towards Christmas, but I’m not sure that is the case with me. My father moved out over a decade ago now, and I miss him like I miss having a broken collar bone. There have not been any significant deaths in my family that I can remember, or rather that would have had a profound impact on me.
What, then, is to be done about it? How should we ‘do Christmas’ if we aren’t feeling great? The truth is, despite what we might see on our newsfeeds or televisions, there is no ‘one-size-fits-all’ method of enjoying festivities. Everybody is unique, our lives and stories individual to us. Do whatever you feel like doing. Do what makes you happy. And don’t - don’t - put pressure on yourself to be happy and festive if you really aren’t feeling it. Want to spend the day in bed stuffing your face with chocolate? That is totally okay!
Take things at your own pace, spend time with loved ones, and ensure your wellness toolbox is open to help you get through this period. And no matter how ‘bad' you think your Christmas is, just remember there’ll be some poor sod on the receiving end of Phil Mitchell’s baseball bat as the Queen Vic witnesses its 4,987,046th brawl. A London pub full of shouty Slater sisters? Anything is better than that…
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